I’m glad you have found your way to my blog one way or another. As you might already know, my name is Nirina, but I have chosen to pick vam-po as my domain and brand name.
If you are interested in its origin, continue reading!
I was born in Germany. My dad is German, my nationality, too. But my mom, on the other hand, is Malagasy.
Do you remember the movies about a zebra, lion, giraffe, hippo and the penguins?
Yes, Madagascar is the isle I’m talking about. It’s also called the 6th continent, because it’s the fourth largest island in the world and inhabits people from Asian and African descent.
I knew I wanted to give homage to that part of me immediately.
Vam-po is short for Ho valin’ ny am-poko. This loosely translates to ‘answering my heart’ or ‘following my heart’.
Thirst of experiences
The health state I’m in right now disallows me to live the life I want to live. But even before I got sick, I deprived myself from opportunities, because I let myself be influenced by external expectations.
I was always one of the youngest. Graduating high school with 16 turning 17 shortly after was way to early to be self-aware enough to know what I should be doing for the rest of my life.
I describe myself as a person who doesn’t have that one talent I’d exceed in. Rather, I would say, I have a lot of passions, I’m more or less good at. The only thing I’m absolutely sure about: I can’t settle down and stay at one place.
I had the privilege of experiencing different cultures since an age of 6 months, moving every 4-5 years.
Adapting to varying surroundings wasn’t hard at all. I love getting to know all sorts of people and landscapes.
Even though I don’t really believe in astrology, I’m a gemini. Maybe, this sort of changing behaviour can be blamed on that.
Back to my point, I was confused. And I knew the path I was on just wasn’t the right one. But, I’ve always finished what I started, instead of truly listening to my heart.
So, listening to my heart is a goal I set myself for the future, but answering it is crucial as well.
A million thoughts
How does one answer their heart you might ask yourself.
Well, I’m the kind of person keeping people at an arm’s length the first time(s) I meet them. In my past I was very reserved, because I made bad experiences trusting some people too early.
Now, I am more outgoing and I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I’m nice as long as my counterpart is nice, too. Still, I try to figure their personality and intentions out. I’m genuinely interested in different views. It plays a huge part in if or how fast I can trust someone.
Maybe that’s the problem, some people can’t live without a period of small-talk.
The same goes for specific skills, talents, passions, evolutional theories, you name it.
Especially anxieties. I figured, everyone has them and they derive through something lying deep inside of you. Maybe it’s a a bad childhood memory, maybe even a good one. Maybe, it’s a hidden passion or talent.
The things people push away the most often tend to be the ones they really need. So, I made a vow to myself to challenge my fears, to answer myself, is there something behind this facade?
Answering my heart means being aware of personal change and acknowledging it. Nobody stays exactly the same their whole life.
I never want to lose myself the way i did before I became ill. Staying present and being mindful is my priority from now on. Nothing else matters, as long as I’m comfortable and happy with how I lead my life.
Every individual life is the paint for the design of the word: Me. And this blog is part of mine.
Vam-po by Nirina